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thanks

layout: detonatedlove♥
pictures: ohhspontaneityy
stocks: _excentric_

The pain in my leg is still not gone. I must have over-stretched myself when I did some home exercise. Been havin trouble walkin, fast in my case, for the past 2 days.

Anyway, yesterday was simply a blast.

Officially started the day at around 2pm when I met Melia. Onli met Xue much later but she was so late we were so afraid that we were gonna miss the first part of the movie. But of cuz we didn't. She was right on time. Hide & Seek was pretty good. Yeah, good story line. But it simply wasn't a horror movie. More of a thriller & suspense. Worth the watch though.

Ally & Zhen joined us later in the day for dinner. We sat at NYDC for like over 3hours simply enjoying each others company. We recalled certain events of the past & lyk Xue said, it was lyk the good old days. With these gals, I'm always my happy self. And together we are always crazy!!

Oh! And thanks to Ally I learn a new phrase. Fling fling. Which simply means fake bling bling. Hah! The silly us..

We ended the night by takin shots inside the MRT station. When it comes to us, we do stupid things. Can't blame us. But I just love these ladies of mine. Love them to bits & pieces.

Anyway gals, hope to meet up again soon. Remember the plans we had for the chalet? Make sure it happens this time.

P.S The pics will be up soon.

Catchin up between us sure is essestial isn't it? Not meetin each other for one month & something so drastic occurred? Woah! I'm surprised. I'm shocked. But lyk they say, Life's full of surprises. Deal with the actual fact.

I've thought it over last night.

Temptation could play a big part. You have one, but that one just isn't around for you to see, express to & confide in. So you seek around for another. To replace that lil' emptiness in you. Alright, maybe the big emptiness. The temptation of that other bein able to fill you soul. Findin another as replacement just doesn't work. Trust me. It doesn't. In fact, you will end up hurtin all of them includin YOU.

On the other hand, things might have happened for a reason. Maybe the other came at the right time for you to look at how things are proceedin with the one. Maybe, just maybe, time has come for you to let go of the one. And to finally get what you always wanted. You might just feel happier.

There you go. I see things in two different light. It's now up to you to decide.

I know you feel trashy & bitchy inside. But face it. It happens in life. That's how life works.

Just some advice. Don't follow your heart entirely lyk how I always do. Cuz yours is a totally diffferent situation. Make use of your head too. It might help you alot. It might help you make the right decision. And, don't drag this for too long. Things might get out of hand. And you might even end up losin both.

I've had my say. Everything's in your hand right now. Dun make any decisions you will regret. I'm just a phonecall away if you need a talk. Take care, Lil' Confused Angel...

Got a brand new clip up. "Get Right" by Jennifer Lopez. Simply love the energy of the music video. And Jennifer Lopez is pure gorgeous.

Btw Geok, the pics are up. Check them out.



Sure I'm dumb. Plain stupid. But I can't help how I feel. I can't help who I love or like. Are we suppose to take control of it? The heart always takes over the mind.

Maybe, just maybe because when it comes to this kinda things I don't trust what I hear. I trust what I see. It will hit me hard when I see it with my own eyes. Seein is believin.

Gal, I'm sorry for not wakin up. It's just me. But, I'll promise you one thing. I'll be strong when things hit the rocks. It'll be time for me to face the harsh world again and take control of myself.





It's been a long time since I saw all the netballers gatherin on court. Way long. I'm not one of those who get jumpy, huggy & emotional when seein those I've not met in a long time. I don't show it. You don't see it. But what's in my heart that concerns. I was so glad to see each & everyone of them. Memories flowed thru my mind. Those of good & bad.

Syamilah, Adeline, Xiaolin, Beifang, Huiling, Wailai, Vanessa, Eileen, Qinyi, Weichun, Sooling & Christina. The presence of you gals made my day. And not forgettin those not around, Huiqi & Seokting. Thanks to all of you for gracin my life.

It was a friendly match alrite. The first time in ages I played on court & I had to get kicked by someone. It was bad enough to earn myself a blue-black. Ouch! I use to get kicked. Those were the netball days. But now I'm not that strong anymore.

I realize something too. That it's high time I get my body back in action. It hit me bad when I started gettin breathless half-way thru the first quarter! Woah!! That's tragedy!

Syam told me something. But I treated it as just another news. The way I responded was not my usual self. Are things changin? For the better? For the worse? Or am I doin it on purpose to hide it all? Forcin myself not to get over-reacted? I don't know. And I wonder. Gal, maybe you can do the wonderin for me.




The season of love? Yeah. Sure it is. 14th Feb. So, goin out to all those celebratin, Happy Valentine's Day!

But why only show love & concern on this particular day? To me everyday is a day filled with love & passion. I've never reali celebrated Valentine's Day. And I dun intend to anytime soon.

Back to what I'm really suppose to say. I'm ready. Ready to express myself from the last time. I've done enuf & lotsa thinkin.

Here goes.

Are certain of my galfrens just so emotionless? And I said certain. I tell them something which might have a gr8 impact on my life & they go "oh..". Cmon! I seriously was taken aback! I thought I could share with you gals problems hopin to get some advice or comfort. But instead I got a unanimous "oh.." & a blank look starin back at me. Where's the special fren I found in you gals. Did it juz disappear suddenly into thin air? Did it decided to turn away from me? Maybe I ought to do some thinkin again on who I reali consider my galfrens. I need more reliable ones.

That was my devil speakin.

Here comes the angel. And I thank my angel so much for makin me see things differently.

Maybe. Just maybe that my galfrens didn't know how to react to the problem. I can't blame them cuz they might never have gone thru it. They might. But that's in the future. For the mo, they have no idea how it feels. So it's just best of me to look past it. I should just count myself lucky that I found frens lyk them. At least they are around to listen to my problems. Rather than keepin it to myself, I have them to release that lil' tension in me. Why get so agitated over something to trivial when I know they will always be around me? Instead I feel blessed.

Finally everything is out in the open. You've seen both side of my thinkin. Don't ask who I'm referrin to cuz I won't breathe a word. But just know that I'm over it.

I've thought things over. I will express myself.

But maybe not today. It's not the right time. My feelings are not stable. I might just say things I don't wish to.

I feel like a devil. But the angel in me is fighting back. Doing so to make me see things in a different light. I just might. But for the moment it's impossible.

I feel lyk a blender. All feelings mixed into one heart.

I simply need to do more thinking.

Finally I got to watch "Shall We Dance?". Love the dance moves. Love the energy. Simply love Jennifer Lopez. With a bod I dream of it just makes the movie almost perfect for me. Totally gr8 movie. Well, at least to me it is.

Well, at last I manage to meet up with Sarah. It's really been some time. Anyway, dun worry gals. I'm not that petty. I'm sorry if I seemed lyk it. Another thing, I'm so not sorry for laughin at my galfren who knocked her head against the wall. And one last thing, give me time to load the pics.

What was the whole dream about? Who was that guy? Why did he appear then towards the end you came about? Did you really mean what you said? Unanswered questions are what I always get.

Old man, I suggest u keep your thing to yourself. Don't try to take advantage of the little space you got. You knew that you didn't have to stand that close to me. I could feel & knew what you were tryin to do.

You need an erection? Need to get aroused? Bloody get your ass back home & do it with your wife. Wife decide to ignore you? Why not just head sumwher private & do some masturbatin. Dammit! We ladies are not made to be your victims.

Think by doin so I could get aroused? Think twice. Tell you what. You failed. I'd rather someone else get me aroused.

Ugh! Call it bad luck or wateva. It just wasn't my day.


I don't know what to feel. At times I feel so great. At times I feel so down.

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be living in a world of solitary. Maybe my life would be so much more pleasant. Maybe I would feel free. But in reality I know I would feel trapped livin a life lyk that. To not interact with the world is lyk being a fish out of water. You don't belong. You feel left out. You feel lyk people are starin & laughin at you.

The days are gettin bad. It's what I feel inside which is worse. Sometimes I wish I never met you. So that I didn't have to go thru what I did. But not meetin you would mean tradegy. Not bein to see & be in contact with you tears me apart. I wish callin you would make a difference but I know to me it wouldn't. I need you to be there when I need someone to hold. Especially now. But I'll try to get by each day. Furthermore, knowin that I found a friend in you just colors my life.

I'll try & am still tryin.

I do things my way.
So don't stop me.

Don't be afraid to make a wrong move.
Because life has a funny way of making all things wrong seem right.

Memories don't do us much good.
It becomes of a burden as we age.



ALTHEA
AMELIA
ANNICE
CHRISTINA
DAYANA
*GEOK LENG*
HERDA
JASON TOH
JOSHUA
SARAH
SHIKIN
SHIMA
SULINAH
XUELI