Life's Pleasures

No doubt I've numbed this heart of mine to a thing called love. But certainly not those of anger and frustration.

I've pretty much kept this for a long time. It's now the best time to release those true feelings of mine.

I keep thinking each time that I'm just being paranoid.
Maybe because I've been been stabbed at the back before.
That lil' bad memory never gets erased.

But somehow the actions and words get more obvious.
And I can't help but notice.
The anger.
The frustration.
The hurt.
These feelings flowed without resistance.
And now I feel like the outcast.

I have no idea what I have done wrong.
Well, I don't even think I did anything wrong.
So there's no point for me to even ask.

What's with the look you give me?
Don't think I don't notice.
Cause' I do.
My eyes are able to cover a pretty large space around me for your info.
Stop giving me the look.
Already the world is constantly looking at this lady who is yet to find her place on Earth.
I don't need another person who does that for a reason I've yet to find out.
Or maybe because I'm looking gorgeous each day?
That I wouldn't mind.
Maybe a compliment would put my mind at ease.
But nah, I doubt that's the ultimate reason.

Then comes the questions.
The questions you asked are not because of a topic we were talking.
Instead....come to think of it I don't even know why.
You ask out of the blue.
And when you've got the answer you go silent.
What's with that?
Actually I know what you're trying to do.
You're here to judge me aren't you?
Save yourself now.
That lil' trick doesn't work on me anymore.
I've gone thru the whole "Ask then Judge" phase.

Don't judge me.
So what if I dress this way? Or that way?
So what if I do this? Or that?
It's my life.
I'm me.
No one other person can reproduce this personality of mine.
Everyone's different.
That's if you don't know.

Talking bout everyone, so what if I hang out with everyone else but you.
I don't owe you all of my time you know.
I've got other friends too.
You're not the only one.
And yes, I feel more comfortable with that someone else.
Don't start giving me the look when I talk or even say "hi" to that someone.
We bond better.
You and I don't have much in common if you would like to know.
But I try work around your personality.
So try to work around mine.
Furthermore it's not like I don't even hang out with you.
I still do, don't I?
I try to spend equal time with all my friends.
I try not to neglect anyone.
So please understand.
Or maybe I can't make you do so.
Cause' your hatred for me already exist.

I really don't know if I have more to say.
I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted.
I don't even know how I feel right now.
Stabbed is a good word.

I'm tired of all this drama in life.

Honestly, I don't fucking give a damn.
There's better things for me to do. And you too.
I'm doing you a favor. And saving your time.

Get a life!!!!
Cause' I've got mine to live too.

Fizah

I do things my way.
So don't stop me.

Don't be afraid to make a wrong move.
Because life has a funny way of making all things wrong seem right.

Memories don't do us much good.
It becomes of a burden as we age.

footprints

don't leave

ALTHEA
AMELIA
ANNICE
CHRISTINA
DAYANA
*GEOK LENG*
HERDA
JASON TOH
JOSHUA
SARAH
SHIKIN
SHIMA
SULINAH
XUELI